[personal profile] what_works
Fandom: Stargate: SG-1
Title: Everyone Loves a Wedding
Author: Em
Rating: PG
Word Count: ~1,025
Pairing: Jack/Daniel
Prompt: from [livejournal.com profile] switch842, Jack and Daniel wedding
019. White (Big Damn Table)
Summary: A different take on the whole "200" wedding scenario.
Notes: Written one of the many times I solicited prompts at my journal. Originally posted here.
written for [livejournal.com profile] stargatefic100


019. White
Everyone Loves a Wedding


Thor turns to Jack, a smile in his voice. "Please repeat after me: I, O'Neill."

Jack is dashing in his suit, more handsome than Daniel remembers him being. "I, uh, Jack." His voice is strong and confident, warm and filled with so much love.

Thor again, "Take you, Samantha." Daniel's heart hitches, a reminder of how painful this really is.

Jack smiles, his eyes starry. "Take you, Daniel."

A murmur shoots through the crowd as Daniel's heart leaps to his throat. Jack doesn't even bother correcting himself. He just shrugs apologetically to Sam, turning to Daniel, who sways on his feet.

"Not much of a secret now, huh?"

Daniel gulps, loudly, staring at Jack's hand as it clamps his shoulder. "It, um. . . ." He steps closer, dropping his voice to a whisper. "What were you thinking?"

"That I wanted it to be you." Jack rolls his eyes.

Sam hits Jack with her bouquet. "I had one shot, O’Neill. One! You two are the only guys I know who keep coming back from the dead. No other men are sturdy enough to date me."

"Carter!" Jack bats at her onslaught, abused roses exploding over the altar. "You knew it was just a ruse."

Carter shoves her bouquet at Daniel, grumbling, "Always a bridesmaid."

Thor coughs, gaining their attention. "Well, if you do not require my assistance any longer. . . ."

Daniel hedges. "Actually, it'd be nice if you could help explain. . . ."

But Thor beams away before Daniel can actually finish his sentence.

"Bastard."

"General O'Neill?" Landry walks the aisle, two members of his flagship team shrinking off to one side of the altar, leaving their friend, co-conspirator, and deviant former-leader to face the music alone.

"Hank," Jack says, spreading his arms wide, invitingly. "Everyone loves a wedding."

Sam and Daniel, pushing a limp bouquet between them, both mumble, "No, they don't."

"Wait a second!" Mitchell nearly jumps out of his seat. "You mean you two are. . . ." He makes some complicated gestures with his hands that might be pornographic, but are so frenetic that it's difficult to tell.

Daniel's eyes slide to Jack's and Mitchell just says in awe, "That explains so much."

"Doesn't it?" Jack grins, squeezing Daniel's ass and earning a yelp.

"General, this is no laughing matter. There are regulations." There's a softness to Landry, a genuine concern for a friend who has finally dug himself a hole that is too deep.

"Bah." Jack waves off the concern. "We'll keep it quiet. Just us members of SG-1. And Walter. And that guy over there. And her. And—Carter, is that your brother?"

Landry gives up, sighs and shakes his head.

"Don't we have some device that alters memories?"

"Sir!" Sam barks, scientifically and ethically outraged.

Jack shrugs one shoulder. "Oh, like these people can't keep a secret."

"So," Vala ventures from the bride's side of the altar. "Does that mean there won't be a wedding?"

"Guess not," Jack says. "Not only are we both," Jack gestures between himself and Daniel, "But we're lacking an officiant."

"Ha!" Vala hitches her dress and takes up the officiant's place. "It just so happens that I'm an ordained minister in the little known local religion on this tiny moon of a planet called Schwindler." Daniel blinks at her, trying to siphon off the bullshit. "I can perform the ceremony. I swear."

Daniel closes his eyes, silently praying that he'll open his eyes and be naked and late to an exam, thus proving that this is just a horrible nightmare. One eye cracks open: still dressed. Two eyes: no exam. Damnit.

"Dearly beloved." The words miraculously silence the murmuring and people regain their seats, confusedly focusing on the bizarreness that tends to coalesce around SG-1. "We are gathered here today to celebrate the love and devotion of these two dear friends." Vala leans slightly, waving them toward each other. "Join hands, join hands."

Jack takes Daniel's hand, hot blushes washing both of their faces. Though he never dared to imagine this—never really wanted this—Daniel has to admit that it's actually quite nice. And Vala's words are surprisingly tender and lovely.

"Now they stand before us, ready to commit themselves to one another and—Daniel, darling." Vala leans again, her voice silky in Daniel's ear. "Are you sure you're ready for this? We could step aside for a few moments, properly prepare you." She winks at Jack, earning a stifled smile in response.

"And so," Vala continues without missing a step, "We, their friends, are here to support them and witness this commitment." Vala waves at them both. "Are you committed?"

"Daniel's been committed before," Jack announces.

"You should both be committed," Daniel mutters.

"Perfect," Vala declares. "Then by the powers vested in me by the Symmetric Figures of the Divine Church of the Schwindlers, I pronounce you husband and husband."

The applause sound somewhat confused.

Vala leans over again, her left breast poised for escape. "You may kiss your husband."

"Er. . . ." Daniel turns, his lips suddenly feeling rubbery and useless.

"Don't be shy." Jack pulls Daniel close with an arm around his waist. His mouth presses against Daniel's, firm and pleasant. An insistent tongue pushes against Daniel's lower lip.

"Woah," Mitchell says. "More than I wanted to see."

Teal'c raises one eyebrow and (because he should have a line) simply says, "Indeed."

"All right, boys, all right." Vala steps forward, breaking them apart. Daniel sucks in a deep, shaky breath. "Process down the aisle, then."

"Mr. O'Neill," Jack says, indicating that Daniel should step in front of him.

"Oh, no. You can take my name."

"Excuse me. Jack Jackson? Why would you want to torture me?"

"Because you torture me every day." Daniel grabs Jack's hand, feeling the flutter in his heart settling down because this day went better than he could have imagined. There were even faces smiling at him, at them.

"That's no excuse," Jack mutters.

Daniel steals a kiss from Jack, preventing further debate.


And they all lived happily ever after!

Until Jack got pictures of Daniel drunk at the reception.


~Comments and feedback are better than wedding cake.

Date: 2007-11-11 05:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] melayneseahawk.livejournal.com
Well, if I felt like someone was reading my original fic (I'm doing short stories, since I didn't have time to plot a novel).

Me, lacking in subtlety? Never.

(And there is seriously cracked out J/D in process, which I shall complete after November ends and I can give up in good conscience.)

Date: 2007-11-12 02:36 pm (UTC)
theemdash: (SG-1 Jack/Daniel Humor)
From: [personal profile] theemdash
If you want to send it on, for you I will read your original fic. (This is because I love you, you know.)

Yay for J/D from you!

Date: 2007-11-12 02:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] melayneseahawk.livejournal.com
Wow, I feel loved.

Plz to be telling me that you're not one of those freaky female slashers who are afraid of girlparts? Paired with other girlparts, I might add, since I'm doing my best to queer the internets no matter what I'm writing.

Date: 2007-11-12 02:50 pm (UTC)
theemdash: (Daniel Sex Please)
From: [personal profile] theemdash
I do not usually read girlparts paired with other girlparts, but I'm not unwilling to read it. So, queer me up! (My husband, I'm sure his brain just twitched and he doesn't know why.)

Date: 2007-11-12 03:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] melayneseahawk.livejournal.com
(Teehee, I promise I won't queer you permanently.)

Lessee, [livejournal.com profile] writers_island has an original fic tag, but here are the highlights, IMHO (and since I wrote it, I can do that):

The best thing on there, I think, is the Danse Macabre series. Currently weighing in at two stories (Danse Macabre and Danse Macabre - Ghost Story, which has art, too), it's my answer to stuff like Constantine, and a way to channel my need to screw with theology. This one definitely has more stories coming, and I definitely plan on NaNoing some.

Other good things include Can't See the Sense in Crying, which has boys and I swear is happier than it sounds; She Blinded Me With Science, which let me be theological again; and Galatea, which I definitely had too much fun writing. There's other ok stuff in the original fic tag, but some of it is seriously crap, so you might want to ask if you venture farther than the aforementioned fic.

Enjoy!

(And now back to my queering up of "Puss in Boots".)

Date: 2007-11-12 03:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] melayneseahawk.livejournal.com
Oh, and you read "Jealous of Your Cigarette", right? That was only half a step from original fic, anyway. :P

Date: 2007-11-12 03:11 pm (UTC)
theemdash: SG-1 classic team (SG-1 Team)
From: [personal profile] theemdash
I love "Jealous of Your Cigarette" and I don't normally like SG-1 AUs.

Date: 2007-11-12 03:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] melayneseahawk.livejournal.com
*feels proud of herself*

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