[personal profile] what_works
Fandom: Firefly
Title: Dinosaur Envy
Author: Em
Rating: PG
Word Count: ~780
Spoilers: none
Characters: Wash, Zoe
Prompt: Wash, humor
Summary: Six weeks on Serenity and Wash can't take it any more.
Dedication: For [livejournal.com profile] crazy_celebrian, [livejournal.com profile] faroutdragon1, [livejournal.com profile] honestly_undone, [livejournal.com profile] lavender_elf, [livejournal.com profile] malnpudl, [livejournal.com profile] sporadic_karma, and [livejournal.com profile] stabbim
Notes: Written as part of the 2005 Gift Fic Project for my flist.
Special thanks to [livejournal.com profile] janedavitt and [livejournal.com profile] grass_stained for betaing duties.



Dinosaur Envy



"The beast surveyed the land, noticing the deep emerald green of the trees, the sky-blue blue of the, um, sky . . . and he turned to his fellow beasts and said, 'This world is good and pure and honest and wholesome and a good place to raise two-point-five children.' And his fellow beasts all nodded and agreed and some hummed but there was one—a heckler.

"This heckler was bitter and cruel and faithless and liked to pretend that he ruled over everything. He was a bastard—that's right, I said bastard—and he liked to decide what the other beasts should do and when they should do things and for how long. And sometimes he paid the other beasts, but mostly they worked for nothing because there was never enough money to pay for the fuel and parts to keep their ship in the air.

"Don't make that face—I am not going off track."

"Honey, the beasts have a ship," Zoe pointed out.

"No." Wash gestured with the tyrannosaurus rex. "Only the bastard has a ship. The rest of the beasts just have to do his bidding. They don't get a ship, they just fly around on it and go where he wants to go." He zoomed the tyrannosaur around and then plopped him back on the console.

"Was there someplace in particular you wanted to stay?" Zoe leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms.

"That's not the point." Wash flicked one of the palm trees. "This isn't an allegory."

Zoe hummed, a quiet smirk on her face.

"Do you know how long it's been since we've been on a planet?" Wash snapped.

"Six weeks, three days, four hours" she replied off-handedly.

Wash did a double take. "Yeah." He blinked; he hadn't actually known the exact figure.

"Sometimes that happens." Zoe shrugged.

"Six weeks of recycled air, Zoe. Six weeks." He nearly whimpered. "I know we go where the money takes us, but . . ."

"Something will come up," Zoe insisted. She walked to her husband and put her arms around his neck.

"Why can't something come up while we're sitting on a planet? Breathing natural air that hasn't been circulating around Jayne?" He leaned into her space, towards her warmth.

"Because the Captain says—"

"Oh, the Captain." Wash rolled his eyes and turned away from her, checking Serenity's blinking read-outs that all reported black, space, boring.

Zoe sighed. "Are you doing that jealous thing again?"

"No," Wash grunted. "I'm doing that stir-crazy cabin-fever thing again."

"We'll have to stop for supplies again soon." Zoe nodded, gazing out at the black. "Maybe it'll be a planet instead of a space station."

"Oh, will Mal let me off the ship this time?"

She cocked one eyebrow and starred down at her man. "Last time I believe it was your choice that kept you on the ship."

Wash's mouth sagged. "You cannot blame that on me."

Zoe turned, her hips swaying, swinging her holstered pistol.

"You were all naked!" Wash shouted pathetically.

She called over her shoulder. "You weren't complaining."

Wash muttered under his breath and turned back to his dinosaurs. He nudged the tyrannosaurus rex out of the oasis and picked up his stegosaurus. He stroked the little dinosaur's head with his finger.

"No one blames you for being horny," he whispered.

He knocked the tyrannosaurus off the console with the back of his hand. The plastic toy spun, bounced, and landed right next to Wash's socked feet. He peered down, grimacing at it, and then smothered it with his foot.

"Yeah, how's the air down there, buddy?"

Wash slumped back in his chair, clutching the stegosaurus to his chest. He mentally plotted a route to Persephone and closed his eyes. He could hear the thrum of the crowd, the barkers shouting the price of their dogs, feel the heat of the sun pressing in on his neck . . . and could almost smell the fresh air.

His foot slipped off the little tyrannosaurus.

"Wash!" Mal's voice buzzed in over the intercom.

He bungled the stegosaurus out of his hand and smacked the intercom. "Yeah, Mal?"

"Got a bite on Greenleaf." Static. "Get there in a hurry?"

"Sure thing," Wash buzzed back. "Will we be there long?" He closed his eyes and crossed his fingers. The intercom was silent for stretching seconds.

"Few days, like."

Wash jumped up, wiggled his hips, and punched the air. He checked the navigation, plotted the course, and leaned back, folding his hands behind his head. Six weeks, three days, and nine hours without touching planet . . . he could live with that (just not again any time soon).



~Comments and feedback are appreciated.
Page 1 of 3 << [1] [2] [3] >>

Date: 2005-12-14 07:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] forcryinoutloud.livejournal.com
::giggles::
Oh Wash how I love thee!!!
::snickers::
This was too cute hun! ;)

Date: 2005-12-14 09:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jedimara77.livejournal.com
Very cute. It cheered me up.

I would like a Wash, please.

Date: 2005-12-14 10:31 pm (UTC)
theemdash: (Default)
From: [personal profile] theemdash
I love my Wash too (but you knew that).

I'm so glad you liked it. *snicker*

Date: 2005-12-14 10:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] forcryinoutloud.livejournal.com
Hee! How can you not like something that has Wash in it?? ::petshim:: SO adorkable ;)

Date: 2005-12-15 12:52 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] queende.livejournal.com
awesome!

i love wash:)

Date: 2005-12-15 12:55 am (UTC)
theemdash: (Firefly Dinosaurs)
From: [personal profile] theemdash
I love Wash, too! :D

Thanks. I'm so glad you enjoyed it.

Date: 2005-12-15 12:56 am (UTC)
theemdash: (Firefly Wash)
From: [personal profile] theemdash
Yay! I'm glad that cheered you up. Everyone needs a Wash.

Date: 2005-12-15 12:56 am (UTC)
theemdash: (Firefly Wash)
From: [personal profile] theemdash
Hee hee. Wash is totally likeable.

Date: 2005-12-15 04:09 am (UTC)
ext_6721: head shot of JJ from Criminal Minds in bottom right corner with purplish to blue background (Default)
From: [identity profile] triggerhappy.livejournal.com
Aaaahhh, Wash! Beautifully done. :)

Date: 2005-12-15 01:53 pm (UTC)
theemdash: (Firefly Dinosaurs)
From: [personal profile] theemdash
Thank you. Glad you enjoyed it. ;)

Date: 2005-12-16 12:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tehshroom.livejournal.com
Aww! You wrote Wash playing with his dinos! Cuter than cute. And you're a sweety for writing these lovely gifts.

Date: 2005-12-16 06:39 pm (UTC)
ext_2180: laurel leaf (hero // sg1)
From: [identity profile] loriel-eris.livejournal.com
Awww, Wash love.

Breathing natural air that hasn't been circulating around Jayne? - I almost died laughing here! *g*

Date: 2005-12-16 07:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mistressrenet.livejournal.com


Nice pacing here, and I love the casual way the Wash/Zoe relationship is addressed.

Date: 2005-12-16 08:16 pm (UTC)
theemdash: (Firefly Wash)
From: [personal profile] theemdash
Wash is the cutest when playing with his dinosaurs. I love them. I think he named them, don't you?

I'm going to take the compliment about being a sweety and molest it run with it.

Date: 2005-12-16 08:17 pm (UTC)
theemdash: (Firefly Wash Kidnapped)
From: [personal profile] theemdash
I almost died laughing here! *g*

You're not the only one. ;)

Date: 2005-12-16 08:18 pm (UTC)
theemdash: (Firefly Dinosaurs)
From: [personal profile] theemdash
They're so sweet together and their relationship is so easy—it needs no attention! ;)

I'm very glad you enjoyed it. You know your opinion means much to me.

Date: 2005-12-17 05:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mistressrenet.livejournal.com
Happy couples are hard to write, though. I think.

I know! That's why I'm trying to be better with the feedback...XD

Date: 2005-12-18 04:20 pm (UTC)
theemdash: (Firefly Kaylee)
From: [personal profile] theemdash
;)

Happy couples are hard to write because they tend to be boring. Or sappy. But writing them just as people tends to work.

I'm going through a fic right now and doing a lot of pulling back to make the happy parts less sappy and more believable. Oy.

Date: 2005-12-29 12:35 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fiannan.livejournal.com
Oh, this was lovely and so very true to character *pats* Thanks for sharing!

Date: 2005-12-29 02:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] goldy-dollar.livejournal.com
And sometimes he paid the other beasts, but mostly they worked for nothing because there was never enough money to pay for the fuel and parts to keep their ship in the air.

"Don't make that face—I am not going off track."


Buhaha. Wash love.

Thank you. That was all kinds of enjoyable.

Date: 2005-12-29 03:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ginnyjake.livejournal.com
This makes me miss Wash so very, very much.

I think that this was wonderfully written. It was great.

Date: 2005-12-29 03:43 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fuckmonkey22.livejournal.com
'no one blames you for being horny' Beautiful! You can just hear the sulking in his voice.

Did Zoe make Mal do that? The timing just feels like it. Yay Zoe.

Date: 2005-12-29 04:39 am (UTC)
vikingprincess: Big girl panties?  I'm putting on my ass-kicker boots and going commando! (Default)
From: [personal profile] vikingprincess
how adorable is that! I love it!

Date: 2005-12-29 04:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thegranddewru.livejournal.com
Writer wanna peanut? :p
That was adorable, and I needed it. Thanks

Date: 2005-12-29 05:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] honorh.livejournal.com
I loved it. You have Wash *down*, especially the line about Jayne and his effect on the air on the ship. That was great!
Page 1 of 3 << [1] [2] [3] >>

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